I know you well enough to know you never loved me.

[labyrinthos]

[Believe it or not, even Nagisa Kaworu has limits as to what he's willing to put up with.

It's been a long day. An inordinately long day. WILLE's latest border skirmish with NERV went as well as could be expected--after all, they have the First Angel on their side. Kaworu hardly needed to lift a finger to annihilate each enemy combatant with his A.T. Field, but they just kept coming and it ended up becoming a meat grinder for multiple hours. His nerves feel as stretched and frayed as a torn ribbon. He would do anything for Shinji-kun, up to and including taking human lives, but that doesn't make it any easier on him.

Worst of all, in spite of their success, the day's efforts weren't good enough for Shikinami. Right now he's staring at Shikinami, his mouth a stark line, displaying none of his usual benevolence whenever she chooses to censure him. He ignored explicit orders on battlefield positioning, or something. He isn't paying attention anymore; her words have blended together into a grating, droning hum. Shouldn't it be enough that they decimated NERV's fighters? It should be enough...

It's been a long day, and a longer cycle, and an even longer stretch of cycles in which all he's done is fail over and over and over again with what truly matters.]

Hey, Shikinami-san...

[He blinks once, twice, then looks down the lithe length of her body. It's been a while. It's been a while, he thinks, swallowing hard, unsure of why he's suddenly feeling this particular urge. The last time he touched Shikinami like he's thinking was hundreds of cycles ago. And yet, relying on instinct alone, he leans in and interrupts her by kissing her on the mouth. It's been a long day and probably this is the most efficient way to relax. The consequences don't occur to him.]

Comments

[interstices]

[It's a sham. That's what it is.]

[Restless, itchy, Asuka's coping mechanisms have been faltering one by one. Outright hostility's gotten her ignored, treated like a child by the crew-- Shinji would have responded, would have flinched, but Kaworu just takes it and takes it and takes it without even a shudder. The thought of Shinji, as always, sends her gut roiling, one fist balling up, nails digging into her palm.]

[Kaworu's perfect, and of course he is; the First Angel has to be. Once, a long time ago, not so long ago, so very long ago, that would have driven her completely off the edge. Sync ratios had been everything to her, the easiest, most honest way to measure her worth in the world. But she can't even blame Kaworu with rendering them pointless. Not really. There's nothing to be proud of now, nothing for her at WILLE but more of the same, over and over again. Victory's sour in her mouth, and the eye behind her patch has been throbbing since morning, and she wonders sometimes if Kaworu's even temper is some kind of sick bid for her attention. If he thinks they're the same because of what's happened to her, what she's become. She could throttle him for the insinuation, except he hasn't said it.]

[He hasn't said it.]

[But his mouth's on hers, right as she's lashing out, cutting her off at the pass. Kaworu's warm, and she doesn't think twice before sinking her teeth into his soft bottom lip, grabbing his shoulder and shoving while still holding onto his shirt.]

What the hell is your problem? Are you even listening?